With all the various appointments and courses and things I’ve had and got coming I feel like I’m missing out on my social life and precious playtime with my youngest boy. He’s grouchy and I’m just as bad. Neither of us are sleeping particulaly well so that’s not great either.
The counselling has been a long time coming and I’m grateful I can get the help but it’s taking its toll on me emotionally. I have another 5 sessions and even then there’s no saying it will go away. I may need more. Then there’s the stress of waiting to find out if we get funding for nursery or if I have to pay for it. If I have to pay I will have to cancel the autism course and counselling there’s no way I can afford to pay £40 a week in childcare even if it is only temporary.
I’m feeling isolated with everything going on and then to add to it all its almost a year since my littlest one had his heart repaired. I have the memories of a year ago to contend with aswell. It’s not easy.