Back to school 

Well god knows how I did it but I survived the 6 weeks holidays. The last 2-3 weeks i’ve actually really enjoyed my eldest took the first few weeks to settle down and once he did and having hubby at home it was great. 

These past 6 weeks haven’t been easy but one thing I’ll say is that I’ve made some fantastic memories with both my children. We had a few days away, days out and we went to places we’d never been before and I loved it. 

I’ve tried my best to prepare my eldest boy for going back to school I just don’t know if it’s been good enough. Today was his last day off. I expected tears much earlier then when they happened. But once he got ready for a bath his anxieties came out and he started crying. My heart broke for him and I felt cruel for telling him he has no choice but to go back. 

Despite much reassurance and taking his mind off how he’s feeling I know how he feels to get so anxious and worked up. Which I suppose helps me understand him slightly better. I wish I could help him more I really do. I wish I could understand him more and make it all ok for him. After all it’s what us mums are suppose to do isn’t it? I’m dreading tomorrow because it’s going to break me if I have to leave him at school crying. I will feel like the worst mother in the world. 

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Author: always over thinking things

I'm 32 years old,married and I'm a full time mum to 2 boys. My eldest is 5 and the youngest is a year old. My eldest boy is on the autistic spectrum and my youngest has a congenital heart defect called tetralogy of fallot. My blog is about my children, about me and my way of dealing with the life I've been given. It's a way of expressing my emotions and feelings through words. This is done anonymously as I want to keep myself away from people who don't know what's happening in my life.

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