A year ago

A lot has happened in a year. A year ago I was struggling with everyday life having a 3 month old baby with a heart defect the impending surgery and the fact my eldest was leaving nursery. I went to a baby group at my sons nursery I’d been going for 6-7 months while I was pregnant. The nursery manager was a friend and she had helped me when I found out about the surgery and the heart defect to the full extent. 

The six weeks holidays were starting a year ago today that’s when I couldn’t cope any longer. I couldn’t carry on bottling up my fears and feelings anymore. The health visitor had been to see the little one at the baby group and weighed him. No issue with his weight and I kept it together until she had gone for a meeting in the nursery office with another parent. Then the community nurse came to check oxygen sats i’d built up a bit of a relationship with her frequently asking questions and nothing  was ever too much for her. All she said was “you look more worried this week” with that I was in floods of tears. I talked through my fears with her and she re assured me but it didn’t help this time. During the holidays i’d be alone no baby group no support network. I was scared how I’d cope I was alone and terrified. 

The nurse left and I was still clearly very upset, the health visitor came out of her meeting and saw the state I was in. I’d never confided in her before, I was always fine. I didn’t know what help she could give even if I had spoken to her sooner. She came and spoke to me and she put a referal in to a charity called Home Start.

 A week later a family co ordinater came and visited me at home. She was lovely. she listened to everything I had to say while I told her everything that I was going through. They have been amazing to me. I had weekly visits from the lady I met and she organised me a volunteer to offer emotional support. In honesty I don’t know where I’d be without them being involved with my family. I couldn’t have coped if it weren’t for them, they have been in my life for a year and now I know I have that support I use it. They are there every time I have a break down, I need help, I need someone to talk to. They never judge me. They are so incredibly supportive I can’t be more thankful to them. 

They helped me when my little one came out of hospital which was only a few short weeks after they started their support. They helped me with settling my eldest into school and his investigations into autism. They have come to appointments with me, wished me luck for hospital visits and come to counselling sessions with me. They helped me with my depression and anxiety and helped me with the fear of leaving the baby. They have provided no end of support that my family didn’t. They still provide support a year later, someone to talk to when things get too much, someone to go to various appointments and support anyway they can.

I would honestly say my life has improved since they got involved and started supporting me. If you need any kind of support I’d suggest you look up your local Home Start office they could change your life too. 

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Author: always over thinking things

I'm 33 years old,married and I'm a full time mum to 2 boys. My eldest is 6 and the youngest is a year old. My eldest boy is on the autistic spectrum and my youngest is 2 and has a congenital heart defect called tetralogy of fallot. My blog is about my children, about me and my way of dealing with the life I've been given. It's a way of expressing my emotions and feelings through words. This is done anonymously as I want to keep myself away from people who don't know what's happening in my life.

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