Alone

There comes a time when things happen in your life.  You look around to see who is there riding the storm with you and then reality hits that you are there alone. 

I don’t want to be alone, I don’t want to cry alone. I don’t want to cry. I want to feel normal again. I want to get my fighting spirit back. 

I don’t open up to many people I don’t tell friends what’s really going on in my head I’m scared of the rejection. Scared of the judgment. Scared of them not being there. I’m alone anyway so might as well stay that way. I can finally talk openly to someone that supports me and in honesty it really helps to have someone I can be totally open with and someone (although it’s their job to talk to me) I feel she actually kinda understands me and knows how to help me. She knows what to say to distract me if I get teary. 

Tonight I’m alone totally completely alone. I’m sad, I’m down, I’m low. I need someone to say it’s ok to feel like this and things will get better again. I try my hardest everyday sometimes things get too hard to cope with. I’ve had so much go on in the last few weeks I can’t cope I can’t deal with it. I need someone. Anyone. I need help. I need to talk. 

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Author: always over thinking things

I'm 33 years old,married and I'm a full time mum to 2 boys. My eldest is 6 and the youngest is a year old. My eldest boy is on the autistic spectrum and my youngest is 2 and has a congenital heart defect called tetralogy of fallot. My blog is about my children, about me and my way of dealing with the life I've been given. It's a way of expressing my emotions and feelings through words. This is done anonymously as I want to keep myself away from people who don't know what's happening in my life.

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